One Month: Como un pulpo en el garaje...

One month in mathematical terms... Number of times I've kissed a stranger on the cheek- oh, say about 100. Jars of Nutella devoured and works of García Lorca seen on stage- 1 each. Number of times my butt has been grabbed by irreverent Spanish man on the street- 1 . Number of times I've said "Shhhhsh!" in my 4th, 5th and 6th grade classes- 4,372. Nights I've stayed out 'til 6 am whilst awaiting the reaperture of the Metro- exact figure not available, but let's just say multiple.

Anyway, I guess what I'm saying is- so far, so good (because who doesn't love a simple cliché to sum up an entire lunar cycle?). This month has been quite fun, this weekend in particular topped the list... My roommates and I had a house-warming party at my apartment that had a great turnout, I went to a birthday party in the city center for a little dancing, we had a Sunday picnic in the park (we even played football- fútbol americano, mind you) and I saw the "new" Woody Allen movie "Whatever Works" in English with Spanish subtitles.

For me, the joy of reading Spanish subtitles during a movie is that I often leave with the translations of a few new and wildly entertaining linguistic snippets. Fortunately, this movie did not disappoint. The most recent of my Latinate metaphors, más perdido que un pulpo en el garaje, is used in correlation with the English metaphor 'a square peg in a round hole' and literally means 'more lost than an octopus in the garage'.

(On a sidenote- I would just like to marvel for a minute at the differences from the Romance to the Germanic languages when it comes to metaphors. While English, Germanic by birth, uses a very functional, no need for imagination type of metaphor 'square peg...' the Spanish come up with 'an octopus in a garage'? My first question (logically) would be- why an octopus? A bear would be just as lost in a garage. Or a toro for that matter (oh goodness, there I go being cliché again...) And why the garage? Why not the living room or the dining room? I suppose when you think about it, the obstacles that the said octopus would need to surpass to find himself in a garage in the first place do require quite a bit of imagination. And tangent finished.)

At times I still find myself wondering what I am doing here in a country thousands of miles away from my family and friends, being an American octopus in a Spanish garage. Living in a hub of concrete, buildings, pavement, plaster, cobblestones, scaffolding, tiles, marble, limestone and everything else that takes the place of grass, dirt, flowers and trees to make up Urbania, I sometimes am quite out of place. I have heard that Madrid is one of the cities in Europe with the most trees, and yet I refuse to believe it. The most bars, certainly believable. Madrid is probably the winner by exponential proportions. I'm not saying that the city isn't lovely, but the most trees? I'm just going to have to wait until I am shown mathematical proof.

As an octopus, I get funny looks when I eat my breakfast on the train on the way to work. Apparently nobody eats in public here unless it's in a restaurant (or they're getting drunk in the street and eating potato chips of course. They actually have a word that means drinking in the street- botellón, see picture to left). And I'm definitely not up in the latest courses in 'Defensive Street Walking'. I've been taken out by old ladies with umbrellas, pushed off sidewalks by workers, pretty much devoured by crowds and with not so much as a "perdon". A toddler even owned me on the sidewalk in front of the Prado last week. Granted I did end up the victor of that showdown due in no small part to my overwhelming size advantage, but you could tell he was the tough one and he didn't go down without a fight.

Of course, the bane of my Madrid existence, is that the bank closes at 2:00 pm. EVERYDAY!! And Does Not Reopen For The Evening. And you can forget about Saturday. It's closed. I have wised up with my one month of experience and have managed to figure out how to make it to the bank between the hours of 8:30-2:00 AND keep a job. It's been tricky, but I've assimilated. Fortunately, aside from the insanity of the bank, the overall adjustment from "Tammy Time" to "Spanish Time" hasn't been particularly difficult. Habitual unpunctuality and mid-day naps are already some of my finest attributes, so really, I've just had to get used to eating lunch at 2 and dinner around 9. Not bad.

To close (as I'm sure by this point many a reader has fallen victim to some other website), regardless of my passive walking skills, need to sleep for an extra 15 minutes in the morning rather than to eat breakfast at home, and severe dislike of banking norms, Spain grows on me more and more. The people are friendly, I can get a huge wedge of Brie cheese for only 2 euro, and the homeless man who sleeps in the plaza around the corner of my house has a pair of skis. For now, I'm content.

~ P.S. As a little bonus for you, I've included a picture of one of many pig's legs that adorn the walls of countless shops here in the city. How appropriate that this particular leg is also being used as a shelf/rope holder and may or may not have won a ribbon. Enjoy!